Youthful self-esteem can be fragile, but there are several keys to working on it effectively.
Self-esteem problems are among the reasons for consultation for which these young people most often go to psychotherapy, and although they sometimes overlap with certain psychological disorders, even in cases where no psychopathology is present, this is a type of malaise emotional that deserves to be treated by professionals.
In this article we will see how self-esteem and self-confidence problems arise in adolescence , and what their parents can do to support them from their role.
The relationship between adolescence and self-esteem
Adolescence is a vital stage characterized by rapid changes, at various levels.
The first is the most obvious to the naked eye, the physical changes we experience once we enter puberty. However, beyond the changes that our body experiences, there are others that are even more important, and that are changes of a psychological nature.
This series of transformations in psychological processes affect both the way young people think and feel and the way they interact with their environment, which complicates everything.
Many adolescents feel lost due to the lack of references in which to identify themselves , being in a moment of transition between childhood and adulthood (with all the variety of roles that it offers), and at the same time they find it difficult to find their own voice in a world where popularity and socialization matter more and more.
These kinds of situations frequently trigger cases of adolescents with low self-esteem and self-confidence problems, since they do not know very well how to define themselves, nor are they clear about how to express their identity in relationships with others, nor do they have a clear way of knowing of knowing, for example, why there are frictions between what you want to do and what others (especially other young people) expect of you: they lack perspective to know how to defend their own point of view view and opinions.
In fact, at this age it is common to see that even boys and girls who enjoy a certain popularity adopt false identities that consist of imitating young people somewhat older than them. Age is often the vehicle through which status is articulated.
What to do to support a teenager who does not trust himself?
Follow these tips to help a teen with self-esteem issues . It can help you regain your self-confidence and find some guidance and references to continue growing.
1. Do not try to impose lifestyle habits that you want for them
Some parents, seeing that their adolescent children have self-esteem problems and are very confused about the way of life they should adopt, try to totally impose on them the way of life they think they should adopt. It is a mistake: in adolescence, the natural referents of young people are other people their age or a little older than them, but not people who left this stage behind a long time ago.
2. Be supportive, but don’t question.
Don’t put too much pressure on him to tell you everything that’s bothering him; that can make your role more of a police type, not an empath, in their eyes. Instead, make it easy for him to open up to you honestly by doing the same thing: talk about similar problems you’ve been through.
3. Emphasize the value of what you do
Do not miss the opportunity to show your satisfaction or admiration for their achievements, no matter how simple or everyday they may be. Also, make it clear to him that his tastes and interests have value even in the case of activities that are not very popular with people his age.
4. Help him adopt a critical mindset
If you make it easier for them to question reality, you will also be getting them to trust their own criteria more and not take for granted that others are better than him or her simply because many people seek the approval of the latter. Show him the arbitrariness of popularity, not to make it happen to not matter to him at all (this is very complicated during adolescence) but to favor that it does not shape all his motivations when it comes to socializing.
5. When in doubt, turn to psychotherapy
In psychotherapy, young people have the opportunity to have personalized professional support in sessions that work on self-esteem, productivity habits, the tendency to question harmful beliefs, and social and emotional management skills, among other things.
Are you interested in having psychological assistance for adolescents?
As we have seen, although adolescence is not an inherently stormy stage of life, it does bring together several elements that often give way to self-esteem and self-confidence problems. Fortunately, with psychotherapeutic support , this type of emotional and behavioral alterations can be overcome.
On the other hand, we also advise fathers and mothers when it comes to adopting upbringing and education methods at home, so that young people improve in aspects such as organization, attending to their responsibilities, preparing for studies, etc.
On the other hand, at UPAD Psychology and Coaching we offer our services both in our center in Madrid and through online psychological assistance services by video call.
Bibliographic references
- Butterworth, G.; Harris, M. (1994). Principles of Developmental Psychology. Lawrence Erlbaum Associates.
- Christie, D. & Viner, R. (2005). Adolescent development. British Medical Journal, 330(7486): pp. 301 – 304.
- Larson, R., & Wilson, S. (2004). Adolescence across place and time: Globalization and the changing pathways to adulthood. En R. Lerner and L. Steinberg Handbook of adolescent psychology. New York: Wiley.
- Ramirez, M.A. (2005). Parents and child development: parenting practices. Valdivia: Pedagogical studies.
To the classic question “what do you do?” I always answer “basically I am a psychologist”. In fact, my academic training has revolved around the psychology of development, education and community, a field of study influenced my volunteer activities, as well as my first work experiences in personal services.
