Loving yourself is essential to living a full life.
There is no doubt that self-esteem has a great impact on people’s lives . Those with high levels of self-esteem are often able to approach life in a much more positive way than those without, which can give them more self-confidence and success.
Everyone can learn to gain self-esteem and have a better quality of life. This article explains the keys to achieving it, giving an answer to all those people who wonder how to improve their self-esteem.
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What is self-esteem?
Self – esteem is the result of the evaluation that a person makes of himself . Many factors come into play in this evaluation, but it can be summed up in a single dimension that ranges from very negative to very positive.
Thus, people with low self-esteem consider that they have many defects. Their perception is that this makes them worse than others, which negatively affects their confidence. However, the adverse effect of this consideration goes further, since it affects their skills and performance in personal and work life.
For example, a person who has low self-esteem may have a lot of uncertainty when making certain personal decisions. On the contrary, the person with high self-esteem tends to take personal matters without much concern.
Also when relating to other people there are clear signs of this. Those who have self-esteem are not afraid of doing something incorrectly or projecting bad consideration towards their own person, being people valued for their safety.
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12 keys to know how to improve self-esteem
Having self-esteem is very important for a person’s life . In this way, and given that you can learn to have it, the best thing is to dedicate yourself to understanding what makes the difference to achieve it.
Below are the main keys to knowing how to improve self-esteem. It is appropriate to read the different points to reflect on the need to make changes in what is proposed in order to have more self-esteem, and that is that you have to live life with love for yourself to be happy.
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1. Put the past aside
The past is something that affects the self-esteem of many people . Some past episodes can generate frustration, but the truth is that life does not stop and thinking about the past does not solve anything. The best thing is to get rid of certain burdens that do nothing but hinder the possibilities of believing in oneself.
2. Accept the situation
Self – esteem can be seen dynamited if things of oneself are not accepted as they are . Josh Billings once said “Life is not about having good cards, but about playing well with the ones you have”. And it is that many times self-imposed expectations can end up ruining the game.
3. Treat yourself well
Everyone does what they can, and this must be applied to oneself . Sometimes self-reproaches can lead to situations in which it is difficult to live, and one must not fall into injustice. On the contrary, you have to be kind to yourself, as well as to everyone; each one fights his fight and it must be respected.
4. Think positive
Cognitive psychology has shown the power of thoughts . It is not about forcing yourself to think what you do not feel, but it is very useful to think about positive things to avoid the tendency to see things from the negative side. For example, before going to sleep, a good idea is to think of three things that you have done well during the day.
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5. Set small goals
One of the most common causes of low self-esteem is the feeling of failure . The idea of failure is something highly mediated by culture and we tend to place too much value on this concept. On the other hand, to be more successful with our goals, it is very useful to set realistic and small goals, which can be achieved little by little.
6. Make a list of things achieved
When you realize that you achieve things, it is easier to improve your self-esteem . People with low self-esteem tend to place little value on their achievements, so their perception may be somewhat biased. Making a list of things achieved during the day can be very appropriate to improve self-perception.
7. Relax
Many people who have low self-esteem beat themselves up a lot . Often the reason is that they consider that there are things that are very important and that do not fit with their person. In this sense, it is essential to keep in mind that nothing is that important, and that obsessive thoughts can be very counterproductive.
8. Reward yourself
In accordance with the previous point, to improve self-esteem it is important to pamper yourself a little . You have to know how to find the moments when you need a little break and give yourself a little reward. We are all worthy of these small considerations towards ourselves, leaving aside the constant demands.
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9. Do not compare
The human being needs to compare himself to define himself , but sometimes there are those who take this to the extreme. It is not healthy to compare yourself as a way of life, since there will always be someone more popular, skilled, successful, experienced, wealthy, etc. Sometimes it’s not about how to improve self-esteem, but how to stop boycotting it.
10. Follow the inner voice
There are people with damaged self-esteem because they don’t listen to their inner voice . It is very important to be true to yourself and fight to live the life you want, since if you don’t, you may blame yourself for certain things that affect your self-esteem. The solution to improve self-esteem also involves making our lives what we want.
11. Socialize
Some people may be surprised to learn that socializing is good for improving self-esteem . However, keep in mind that people with low self-esteem often withdraw into themselves and feed their negative thoughts. Socializing is a way of receiving feedback and understanding that, sometimes, the one who has a bad opinion of us can only be ourselves.
12. Be constructive
One of the characteristics of people with low self-esteem is that they are sensitive to criticism . You have to accept them in the most constructive way possible, and when they arrive you shouldn’t beat yourself up by blaming everything. On the contrary, you have to take advantage of this information and empower yourself with it, trying to improve but realistically.
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Bibliographic references
- Baumeister, RF, Campbell, JD, Krueger, JI, & Vohs, KD (2003). Does High Self-Esteem Cause Better Performance, Interpersonal Success, Happiness, or Healthier Lifestyles?. Psychological Science in the Public Interest., 4 (1), 1–44 .
- Bonet, J.V. (1997). Be friends with yourself: self-esteem manual. Maliaño (Cantabria, Spain): Editorial Sal Terrae.
- Rojas, L. (2007). The self-esteem. Barcelona: Editorial Espasa.
To the classic question “what do you do?” I always answer “basically I am a psychologist”. In fact, my academic training has revolved around the psychology of development, education and community, a field of study influenced my volunteer activities, as well as my first work experiences in personal services.
