The problems of low self-esteem can be solved if we incorporate good habits into our day to day.
In fact, in virtually all branches of behavioral science the way in which we value ourselves has a relevant role, and helps to understand why we do what we do and for what reasons we feel emotional discomfort in some situations.
Throughout the next lines we will see several keys to know how to maintain good self-esteem, different habits and strategies to help us value ourselves in the most appropriate way: no more, no less. Low self-esteem is a common problem, but with these strategies you can improve it little by little.
- Recommended article: “How to improve self-esteem? 12 keys to achieve it”
How does having good self-esteem benefit us?
Our self-esteem, as we have seen, is the idea we have of ourselves, to which we add the emotional component of how we value ourselves. That is, it does not simply consist of the information we have about our own identity (a content that can be explained in words), but also includes the contents of our emotional memory about who we are.
Of course, there is no single way to interpret who you are, but there are several possible ways to value your “I”. However, some of these ways of seeing oneself are more constructive and adequate than others, in the sense that some of them simply keep us in a pessimistic and catastrophic mentality before which we remain motionless, not daring to break that version of our self-esteem.
In other words, some forms of self-esteem are harmful to oneself, and can even feed and favor the appearance of mental disordersdue to their vicious circle effect: as we believe that we are worthless, we do not dare to do something that proves us wrong about ourselves and what we are capable of doing.
On the other hand, other forms of self-esteem can manufacture an excessively idealized image about ourselves, something that often leads us to get frustrated when things do not go as we had planned.
In both cases, it is important to know some strategies to maintain good self-esteem, that is, a way of interpreting our identity that serves to keep us in the balance between what we can do and what we cannot do now or, in some cases, probably never.
Tips to combat low self-esteem
Now let’s see different tips to maintain a good self-esteem , one that is balanced and that does not cause us problems in our interaction with the reality that surrounds us.
1. Stop maintaining toxic relationships
It is natural to have low self-esteem if we are used to surrounding ourselves with people who do not value us.
Ultimately, our opinion of ourselves is not an island: it is strongly influenced by our interpretation of how others see us. The problem is that other people do not have to have a more objective perspective than ours when it comes to determining what we are like and what can be expected of us.
So, if you suffer from low self-esteem, one measure to take would be to stop seeking acceptance from those for whom nothing you do is right; simply look for other priorities when managing your time to socialize .
2. Undertake projects
If necessary, force yourself to start at least one project that you feel you could do if you make an effort, and create a calendar of sub-goals to achieve one after another. In this way, you will have a clear perspective on the extent to which you have the capacity to do things that are interesting or stimulating, and even creative in many cases.
Of course, it is important that you really commit to that goal, so you should avoid falling into excuses so that the fear of failure does not paralyze you. The most useful thing is to set very precise deadlines and even rigid schedules .
3. Question your beliefs about who you are
The fact that your beliefs about your identity are deeply rooted in your way of thinking does not mean that they are true . Cultivate the habit of examining your actions in retrospect and compare their existence with those ideas you have about yourself.
When you think of something that went well for you, it is important that you reflect on whether it is reasonable to think that it was simply luck: in many cases, the skills and competencies that one has developed explain almost all of those personal triumphs.
On the other hand, if you suspect that your self-esteem is not in line with reality because it is very swollen, go the other way: has everything that has turned out well for you depended exclusively on your actions, or have the actions and decisions of others had something to do with that result?
4. Enrich your social life
It is important that you expose yourself to different opinions about yourself, so that a very biased idea of ”I” does not take control of your self-esteem. Meet new people, look for friends who share your different hobbies with you: it is not necessary that all your friends are part of the same group.
This is one of the tips to maintain good self-esteem that involves more effort, because it requires cultivating social relationships and friendships in a stable way , but it is also one of the most enriching.
5. Take care
It is difficult to feel good about oneself if the physical state of one’s body is poor ; physical discomfort translates into psychological discomfort unless we take action on the matter. Sleep well, eat well, and try to do some kind of moderate exercise.
The secretion of neurochemicals such as endorphins or serotonin help us to feel better, to be more predisposed to a good mood, to socialize, to carry out pleasant activities, etc. Playing sports helps the brain feel fit and gives us extra vitality, energy and positivity.
6. Go to the psychologist if you need it
It is totally natural to go to the psychologistwhen we experience an emotional problem; It is not necessary to have a diagnosablemental disorder.
This type of professional can help you through psychological intervention and the resolution of your doubts; Fundamentally, it will indicate several strategies for interaction with the world and society that will contribute to building a more solid, realistic and functional self-esteem over several weeks.
References
- Branden, N. (1969). The Psychology of Self-Esteem. New York: Bantam.
- Branden, N. (2001). The psychology of self-esteem: a revolutionary approach to self-understanding that launched a new era in modern psychology. San Francisco: Jossey-Bass.
- McLeod, Saul (2007). “Psychology Perspectives”. Simply Psychology.
- Papalia, D. & Wendkos, S. (1992). Psychology. Mexico: McGraw-Hill
- Triglia, Adrian; Regader, Bertrand; Garcia-Allen, Jonathan (2016). Psychologically speaking. Paidós.
- Vidales, Ismael (2004). General psychology. Mexico: Limusa.
To the classic question “what do you do?” I always answer “basically I am a psychologist”. In fact, my academic training has revolved around the psychology of development, education and community, a field of study influenced my volunteer activities, as well as my first work experiences in personal services.
