Jealousy is a set of negative emotions, thoughts and attitudes towards situations in which we feel that something valuable is in danger. Let’s look at the different kinds of jealousy to learn how to detect them.
Jealousy. That great evil of society. In the last almost five decades, experts from various fields, such as psychology, sociology, biology and medicine have begun to give special importance to this phenomenon and to contribute knowledge from their research. Some scholars claim thatjealousy is the result of a social construct determined by social norms that dictate that a person should feel jealous and respond in a certain way to triggering situations.
Experts comment that exposure to mass media is an extremely important vehicle to contribute, passively, to the creation of certain patterns of thought and response related to jealousy. The debate is open and various hypotheses have been raised.
- We recommend you read: “Jealousy problems in the couple: what to do to overcome them?”
What is jealousy?
Jealousy is considered one of the three most frequent problems experienced in intimate relationshipsand can become a very important problem in relationships. As a fact to reflect on, in the United States, in the period between 2009 and 2013, a total of 433 homicides were reported committed as a result of a love triangle, where jealousy probably played a very important role. And it is that this phenomenon can end up linked in some cases to violent crimes, depression and suicidal thoughts.
Throughout the culture of the human being and from different forms of expression, such as painting, literature or cinema, people have expressed one of the most universal emotions: jealousy. Jealousy is one of the most famous challenges in intimate relationships. It is a word that sounds remotely unknown to us. However, it is often difficult for us to define it precisely and the definition can vary or take on certain nuances depending on the context of jealousy.
According to Professor Jennifer Bevan, jealousy is an experience consisting of both thoughts, emotions, and behaviors in response to the perception that an outside figure is jeopardizing a valued relationshiptag. This definition can be a bit lame in certain situations, so it is more efficient to divide jealousy into different subtypes in order to describe them more effectively.
Next we will address a list making a classification of 10 different types of jealousy. However, before continuing, it is important to note that this is an informative article and that if you need more information or help in this regard, it would be best to go to a psychologist specialized in this subject.
What kinds of jealousy are there?
As we have said before, jealousy makes up a set of thoughts, emotions such as anger, hopelessness, disgust and envy as well as behaviors. In fact, we often tend to think that jealousy is synonymous with envy (in fact some people use them equivalently), since both terms tend to appear in the same situations.
In addition, feelings of insecurity, fear and concern about the lack of possession or security in certain situations often accompany this phenomenon. Although the main idea that comes to mind is that of envy in relationships, it not only occurs in these situations, butit can occur in situations of friendship and in social situations in general. Even sometimes it is not necessary the presence of another person to fall into this category.
1. Material jealousy
This type of jealousy is one of the most instinctive and primitive of the human being and its principle is based on the attachment to certain material objects. They are easy to detect in infancy and the elderly, as well as in other animals. In these cases,we anxiously defend our possessions , we will get angry if someone approaches or lays hands on them and in more exaggerated cases, we can start a fight with other people to keep these materials in our possession.
2. Social jealousy
This jealousy is noticeable in many social situations in which people feel that they must compete with one or more people to demonstrate their success, better skills in certain activities, or show that they are above others. The main characteristic or basis of social jealousy is the comparison with other people and the need to defend our social image. It can happen in many types of social environments, such as sports, the world of work, or simply someone you meet somewhere and awakens your sense of competition.
3. Family jealousy
We speak of family jealousy as those that arise between related people , are linked to the need for security and belonging and can be classified in turn into two types of family jealousy depending on the relationship that exists between them:
3.1.Horizontal jealousy
They are those in which the people involved play the same role. A classic example is the feelings of jealousy between siblings that we have all experienced or heard of.
3.2.vertical jealousy
in this case there is a generational difference between the people involved and therefore they play different roles. This would be the case of jealousy between the daughter-in-law and the mother-in-law, who feel that they compete for the affection of their son/partner. Or, the case of parents and children, where the former can feel envy about childhood and the privileges that their children have and that they do not have now or never had.
4. Professional jealousy
fairly common problem in society. They arise both among colleagues in the same position, who feel that they are competing and compare their productivity with that of the rest, and with people with different job positions, such as the employee and the boss, where the employee feels envious of the person who has a more important position.
5. Preventive or possessive romantic jealousy
Now we turn to the most famous type of jealousyand the ones that first come to mind when thinking about the word “jealousy”. These in turn could be classified into three different distinctions, which attend to the emotional, cognitive and behavioral character.
This refers to whether we simply have a feeling of discomfort when we feel that our relationship may be threatened, or if we develop thoughts and develop these emotions of jealousy in our head, or if after having done both, we take action and we engage in certain behaviors in response to our feelings and thoughts.
The case of romantic jealousy of a preventive type or also called possessive refers to the efforts made by a jealous person to avoid contact between their partner and people of the opposite sextag. For example, individuals with possessive cleos do not consider it acceptable for their partner to have friends and/or socialize with people of the opposite sex. In extreme cases, the jealous person may resort to violence or harassment in order to limit the autonomy of their partner.
6. Reactive or emotional romantic jealousy
Reactive jealousy consists of the range of negative emotions that we experience, such as anger or discomfort, when our partner has been emotionally or sexually unfaithful to ustag. For example, people may feel angry or hurt when their partner is flirting or kissing someone. This type of jealousy is normal to feel because a situation of real external threat is the trigger.
7. Anxious Romantic Jealousy
Anxious jealousy refers to the process in which jealous people have obsessive thoughts and images in their head about their partner committing an infidelity, which leads them to experience feelings of anxiety, suspicion, worry and mistrust. It is important to note that, in contrast to reactive jealousy, both possessive and anxious jealousy may not only be motivated in response to partner behaviors that generate distrust, but may also occur in the absence of this type of behavior.
8. Flashback Romantic Jealousy
Although we have all heard of or even experienced various varieties of jealousy, this retrospective type of jealousy is also very well known. It is based on the obsession and concern about our partner’s past. In this way, sometimes the jealous person wants to know everything, in great detail, about their partner’s previous relationships, both flirtations and more serious relationships, both day-to-day routines, as specific moments in sexual interactions or the type language used between them. Retrospective romantic jealousy in many casescomes from feelings of insecurity and lack of self-esteem , in which the jealous person tends to compare and feel inferior to previous partners.
9. Projective Romantic Jealousy
Another very interesting type of jealousy is projective jealousy, these consist of the existence of fears and concern for our partner committing sexual or emotional infidelities that we want to committag. An example of this would be when, even having a great relationship, we begin to develop sexual fantasies in our minds with people other than our current partner. One way to perhaps free yourself from this conflict is to blame the other person for these desires that belong to us, even if it is a somewhat irrational mechanism.
10. Pathological jealousy
Jealousy is a very human set of emotions, thoughts and behaviors. However, we must be careful with their magnitude and development, becausein extreme cases they can become dangerous for our mental and physical health, as well as that of our partner. Sometimes, it is pathological jealousy that devastatingly ends long relationships.
In pathological jealousy, there is a distortion of reality and ideas as well as obsessive attitudes are combined. In them, the person with pathological jealousy compulsively searches for evidence or facts that confirm her theories and oppressively controls her partner, sometimes following her throughout the day. This type of jealousy is found in psychological diagnostic manuals and is classified as delusional disorders.
These delusional disorders include obsessive, anxious, paranoid, separation anxiety jealousy (the person is unable to accept that their relationship may have an end) and post-detachment jealousy (those that originate after a relationship has ended).
In conclusion, jealousy has existed and represented in culture throughout the history of mankind and sometimes it is necessary to go through it. However, care must be taken so that these do not develop and reach pathological extremes in which it is highly recommended to seek professional psychological help. As we have seen, today there is some confusion between the words “jealousy” and “envy” and they tend to be used synonymously. We find different types of jealousy, being able to be material, social and, the best known, romantic. With this article, we hope we have entertained you and have shed a little more light and clarity on the interesting topic of jealousy.
To the classic question “what do you do?” I always answer “basically I am a psychologist”. In fact, my academic training has revolved around the psychology of development, education and community, a field of study influenced my volunteer activities, as well as my first work experiences in personal services.
