The 15 most important communication skills

Fortunately or unfortunately, every human being knows that “non-communication” does not exist. It is impossible not to express ourselves with other human beings (either consciously or unconsciously), because even the deepest silence reveals a concrete message and intentionality.

Thus, in a global society composed of more than 7.7 billion people, communication and the transmission of messages and knowledge is essential. That is why today we take the opportunity to tell you the 15 most important communication skills, because a correct capacity for diction and understanding can allow the individualto go very far on the social scale.

• We recommend you read: “The 32 types of communication that exist (and their characteristics)”

The importance of communication

We are in an era in whichcommunication is being redefinedfrom a conceptual point of view, because for example, 82% of people with access to the internet between 18 and 29 years of age use some type of social network. In addition, it is estimated that more than 140 million tweets are sent per day, so it is not unreasonable to claim that certain people communicate more online than face-to-face.

This reality is changing the human perception of communication and transmission of information, because according to studies, up to 55% of communicative messages in humans are provided with non-verbal facial expressions (gestures, body position and eye contact, for example). Paralinguistics, that is, the transmission of information beyond the direct message (tones and insinuations) suffers a hard blow in the processes of written communication.

Due to the expansion of the internet (more than 4,500 million peopleuse it), written communication is booming, because the subjectivity of the sender, the methodology for the formation of the message and a characteristic composition make this medium something ideal to form a clear and concise idea.

• We recommend you read: “The 10 types of logical and argumentative fallacies”

The essential communication skills in modern society

Without further delay, and once we have evidenced the linguistic dichotomy in which we currently find ourselves, it is time to explore the 15 most important communicative skills in contemporary society.

15. Know how to write

It may seem obvious, but if we conceive a dialogue as a form of verbal or written understanding in which two or more people communicate in an exchange of information (alternating positions of sender or receiver), it is clear that knowing how to express oneself through writing is something increasingly essential.

According to the United Nations Educational, Scientific and Cultural Organization (UNESCO), more than 793 million people cannot read or write worldwide. Of course, this is a capacity that we take for granted, but nothing guaranteed in low-income regions.

In addition, writing ability is not based only on the formation of words. Features such as conciseness, verisimilitude, simplicity, cohesion and many other parameters thatmaximize the clarity of the message are valued.

14. Eye contact

Although it may not seem like it, eye contact is an essential part of communication in living beings. Studies estimate, for example, that an adult human must make eye contactduring 60-70% of a conversationto create an emotional bond with the recipient of the message.

The lack of eye contact usually indicates, on the part of the sender, a lack of confidence about the message being transmitted, discomfort or insecurity. Therefore, learning to look into the eyes is essential to get the other person a clear and concise idea.

13. Consistency

If we understand coherence as the relationship, connection or union of some things with others or that which interconnects or holds together the parts of a whole, it is clear that we are facing an essential feature in the communicative process. The right thing is that both the body and the tone, face and mindconvey the same message.

12. Avoid power dynamics

In a hierarchical society, it is sometimes difficult not to use an advantageous situation to impose a message by force. Whether directly or indirectly, conveying an idea based on the fear of possible repercussions is never a good option. Respect must be earnedon the basis of deeds and understanding, not arbitrary impositions.

11. Negotiation capacity

Negotiating is not only based on monetary exchanges, since any dialogue resulting from dissent that requires a common decision can be considered a negotiation. The bases to negotiate correctly are based on knowing how to identify conflicts, provide reliable data that support the ideal pursued, and above all, listen to the arguments of the other.

10. Use of gestures

As we have said before, studies estimate that55% of human communicationoccurs through nonverbal facial expressions and 38% through paralanguage. Tones, gestures and insinuations say much more than any word, so relying on our own expressions and gesticulations is always a good idea to convey a concrete message.

9. Active listening

The act of communication requires a sender and a receiver, and in many cases (especially in extensive explanations), the sender needs reaffirmation to continue expressing his message comfortably and freely.

It is for this reason that accompanying as a receiver an explanation with words such as “yes”, “I understand” or “continue” is usually a good idea. The issuer feels heardand, in turn, perceives a real or unfounded interest on the part of the one who is receiving the information. All of this is known as active listening.

8. Clarity

In both written and verbal language, clarity is the queen of information transmission. Several studies show that the attention span on the internet of the human being lasts about8 seconds, so the message is clear: to get to the point in a society in which everything goes too fast. And we must constantly try to recover and maintain the attention of the listeners.

7. Selecting the most suitable channel

It may seem anecdotal, but depending on the channel in which the information is presented (writing, speech or images, for example), the message can change completely, and therefore, its transmission effectiveness as well.

6. Avoid elements that hinder verbal communication

Verbal communication and proper active listening can be weighed down by various acts of the receiver, such as judgments, distractions, interruptions, denials and counterarguments. It is necessary to take into account a clear concept: we listen to understand, not to refute. If the receiver’s first words after an argument are “already, but”, it is quite possible that he was not paying attention to the ideas of the sender.

5. Apply discerning listening

Sometimes, active listening (understanding the message and supporting understanding with voiceovers) does not have to be the best resource. Sometimes it is required to listen discernively, that is, pay more attention to the most relevant details, select them and extract them from the overall message. This usually saves time andavoids confusionand deception.

4. Involvement

Many of these elements, in a way, belong to the wide range of acts that active listening encompasses. Attention deficit hyperactivity disorder (ADHD) is on the rise, with prevalences of up to 5% in certain populations. This denotes a series of dysfunctions of genetic and environmental combination increasingly present in our society.

When establishing communication, one of the most essential factors for the message to be transmitted effectively is that both sender and receiver can be able to abstract from the medium andfocus onthe momentary connection with the other.

3. Suitability to the receiver

Of course, when transmitting a message as issuers, the information must be presented in one way or another  depending on the person to whom  the message is addressed . This does not mean that we should mask our condition to mimic the one who receives the message: it is about adapting and understanding, not imitating.

2. Exercise empathy

Empathy, defined as the ability to put oneself in another’s place, recognizing them as equals, is the basic skill in any type of social interaction. According to various studies, empathic capacity depends on gender and age, since it has been observed that women and the elderly have higher objective indicators of empathy and emotional intelligence.

Of course, no predisposition is an excuse for not exercising empathic activity day by day. We all have in our power the ability to perceive and integrate empathy, so looking for methods that allow us to exercise it is almosta citizen obligation. It is not about treating others as we want to be treated, but about understanding how they want to be understood and adapted to their needs.

1. Assertiveness

Of course, many of the most important communication skills can be housed under the umbrella of assertiveness. If we define this complex term as a social skill that consists of knowing one’s own rights and defending them (respecting others), we can conclude that, in a modern society characterized by individualization and lack of attention, knowing how toconvey our desires to the other in an educatedand effective way takes precedence over everything else.

Located between passivity and aggressiveness, assertiveness allows us to position ourselves at an intermediate point, a balance that allows us to effectively issue our wills and rights without stepping on those of others. There are multiple assertive techniques to take into account to improve in this area at the individual level, which can be learned in psychological sessions.